Contact Info
E-mail: rowan (at) sexyhobbitsuperstar (dot) com
DO NOT CONTACT IF YOU ARE: a Nigerian prince/businessman/etc...,
trying to sell me porn, trying to make my penis bigger, or simply spamming
for your band's MySpace page — I know it's a scam, I have plenty enough
spank material, my penis is already bigger than the Internet, and in all
honesty, I'm probably going to think your band sucks and then wind up hurting
your feelings.
FEEL FREE TO CONTACT ME IF: you are Prince1, 2,
you're my favourite gay porn model3, or if you're interested
in artistic or musical collaborations. No, really, my penis is fine.
You can also contact me... if you bought something from the CreateSpace
page, it became damaged in shipping, and Amazon are being dicks about it4;
I really don't have much money, and it may be a while before I can replace
something for you, but I honestly care that much about pleasing my readers.
1: but please keep in mind that I'll just tune you out
and fantasise about your bum from the 1999 Disc 2 dust sleeve if
you start talking about Jesus
2: Also, seriously, while you're reading this — what in
the world were you trying to say with "Annie Christian"? This query has
plagued me since I was eleven.
3: ...but I'll also accept anybody who's been in a Bel Ami vid
in the last seven years
4: But PLEASE contact Amazon/CreateSpace first, though —
they have a better customer service reputation than Lulu and CafePress,
so please try to get problems resolved with them, BEFORE trying with me
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copyrighted and may not be used without the permission of the author.
